Over the past few years, I have made a commitment to myself to sew for the girls twice a year. I used to sew more. However, as I have become busier, I needed to focus and figure out what was the most important aspect of these projects for me. This year, with all the things I am trying to accomplish, I almost broke my commitment.
I really wanted to sew dresses for the girls for Easter but it always seemed to conflict with time and money. As Easter got closer, it was really tearing me up inside. I didn’t want to be the mom who used to do things for her girls until she got too busy. Last Sunday, I sat down with myself and tried to work a compromise with what I wanted to do and what I could do.
Dejected, I sighed and said “Well, I guess I can make the easy pillowcase dresses…” I went downstairs, pulled out the 3 pillowcases I had found at the thrift store and just stared at them. It didn’t feel right. I didn’t feel like I was honoring my agreement with myself.
Back downstairs I went to my craft room and gather up the patterns mom had given me at Christmas. I sat looking at them, ticking the time it would take for each of them in my head. Finally, I found the perfect one.
And, I gave myself permission to take the day off just to sew. I knew that If I could focus and concentrate, I could get it done. Once I made the decision, the rest came easy: I had enough material, enough time, and didn’t need to leave the house for any other supplies. This felt right.
Sewing, for me, is like a mini-mediation with the silence of the house coupled with the rhythmic sound of the sewing machine. I have come to realize that in order for me to move forward with business stuff, I need to give myself permission to sew for a full day. No only am I creating something special, I allow my mind to drift with the rhythm and I get inspired in other areas of my life.
It is hard as a parent to get everything you want done to actually get done and completed. I have made friends with imperfection and incompleteness. As long as I give it a good try, I have become comfortable saying to others: I was able to get this done, but not that…yet.
Easter weekend in only half over and I still have more to do. Little by little, it will get done and my satisfaction is that I have done my best which has brought an extra bit of magic into our little family.